Virgin Territory

Thursday, January 21, 2010

Easy now. Not trying to raise any eyebrows but I am indeed in virgin territory. This is my very first ICLW!

If you are stopping by for the first time, welcome. I hope that through ICLW I get off my arse and actually start commenting on other blogs as well. I confess, that is not my strong suit. But that doesn't mean I'm not reading. I do. I promise.

So a little bit about myself. I was born and raised in Ireland and after university spent a few years living and working in Dublin. I met my lovely Canadian wife at a party in the U.S. (go figure!) and after a couple of years of long distance dating we took the plunge and got married and I've been living here in Canada ever since.

We married young. My wife was still in school and wanted to finish that before starting a family. We then decided to wait a wee bit longer as we got established in our careers, bought a house, and got ourselves "ready". That took about 7+ years! Had we known what we know now.... well, you can't go back, so I guess that doesn't matter much does it?

After a year of trying unsuccessfully on our own we started seeking help at the fertility clinic where my wife was diagnosed with PCOS. We thought that was our only fertility obstacle when my semen analysis (SA) came back with zero sperm. You read me right. Zero. We were floored. Since then I have had varicocele surgery in the hopes of producing some swimmers but haven't had much luck. My azoospermia is a result of testicular failure. Not exactly what a guy wants to hear. No man wants to be known as a failure in the 'junk' department.

While there is a very small chance that a testicular biopsy (aren't you glad you're reading all of this?) may produce some viable sperm to use via IVF with ICSI my urologist, who is an awesome and honest guy, has recommended the use of a donor in my particular situation.

While this wouldn't be everyone's cup of tea, my wife and I have made the decision to go forward with IUI's using donor sperm. We've been off treatment for a little while as she focused on some other health priorities but are heading back into it all in the coming month.

So there you go. I'll be honest. Sharing all of this stuff isn't exactly easy. But male infertility needs a voice so I'm hoping that I'm one of them. I hope that my blog provides some solace for other guys out there dealing with IF issues of their own as well as their partners who are maybe looking for a male perspective.

Thanks for stopping by - I hope you will again. Cheers.

20 comments:

Noelle January 21, 2010 at 9:17 PM  

Thank you so much for participating in ICLW! I really enjoyed reading this post, and I have been a follower of yours. Thank you for being a male voice.

I wish that we would have started earlier too.

I look forward to following you and seeing your precious miracle.

Katie January 22, 2010 at 6:39 AM  

Thank you for sharing your story! I really look forward to reading more about you and your wife's journey and I wish you both the best of luck!

Michelle January 22, 2010 at 6:45 AM  

Hi & Welcome to ICLW.
My Dh and I have the same diagnosis for each of us PCOS for me and NOA-Testicular failure for him. Crazy world. Looking forward to spending some blog time with you and your wife.

thegalwho January 22, 2010 at 9:14 AM  

Wow yay another blog to read from the male point of view, there really is too few of you who write!!

You've just gained yourself a follower!

ICLW
Rach
www.thegalwho.wordpress.com

R.J. January 22, 2010 at 10:48 AM  

Thanks for participating! It's so refreshing to find a male perspective on the donor subject. I plan on sharing with my DH :) We have been battling severe MF and after 4 failed IVFs, we are on our 3rd dIUI (date for tommorow, actually).

Best of luck to you as you move forward with dIUI!

R.J. - ICLW

Kim January 22, 2010 at 10:59 AM  

It's really refreshing to have a male perspective, I thought us women were the only ones for a while! Thanks for sharing your story and I am looking forward to following you on your journey to parenthood.

daega99 January 22, 2010 at 2:03 PM  

Thanks for sharing your journey thus far.

My husband's an Irish citizen (among toher nationalities) and we love to visit his family in Wicklow.

ICLW
http://daega99-arewethereyet.blogspot.com/

Fran January 23, 2010 at 9:18 AM  

Well done for enrolling to ICLW! look how many Irish are around, isn't that just brilliant? Do you still do "tracing" when you hear someone is from Ireland? My DH has it in his DNA! Anyway, looking forward to reading you more. Fran (ICLW too!)

Baby On Mind January 23, 2010 at 11:58 AM  

Hello fellow ICLWer! It's so great to have a male perspective out there. Thanks for sharing your story. I'll be following your journey!

Krissi January 23, 2010 at 7:02 PM  

Good for you for writing about it! I wish you were around when my hubby and I were going through it. He really didn't have ANY outlets of anyone who could relate! Anyway, I added your button! So cute by the way! ;-) ~mymiracles77
http://stressfreeinfertilityblog.com

~Jess January 24, 2010 at 10:58 AM  
This comment has been removed by the author.
junebug January 24, 2010 at 12:24 PM  

Kudos to you for bravely telling your story. My husband will barely discuss it with me let alone think of talking with anyone else. I hope your voice helps others.
ICLW

subfertilefrugalista January 24, 2010 at 1:21 PM  

Great to read your perspective on things. I think it's an important thing that you're doing. As women, we have so many places to go to meet other people and read stories like our own, but men don't have it that easy.

Wishing you and your wife all the best!

Christina
the subfertile frugalista
iclw

mommyinwaiting January 24, 2010 at 10:02 PM  

Thanks for providing the male voice. It is great to know there are other guys willing to open up about their IF and helps me to understand some of what my hubby is going through.

Clare January 25, 2010 at 5:35 AM  

Just wanted to say that I really admire that you are here sharing your story. It is unfortunately all too rare that we get to hear the male side of IF and I sincerely congratulate you on having the courage, dare I say balls, to be honest about it. I know a lot of men and women will be able to relate and to take solace that they are not alone in this. I wish you and your wife the best with your future TTCing and look forward to following your story. Oh and welcome to ICLW! It's the best!

Mrs. Gamgee January 25, 2010 at 9:54 PM  

Welcome to ICLW!

Like so many other commenters have said, it's great to have another guy around here. My Beloved has commented that there aren't enough men willing to talk about these things (of course he doesn't blog about it... go figure). It's also great to find another (sort of) Canadian.

Serendipity January 27, 2010 at 6:49 AM  

Welcome to ICLW, we've got such a great community here and it's great to add another male view to it, there really aren't enough of you willing to share.

Best of luck for the comming month, I hope your journey is short :)

apieceofwood.co.uk January 27, 2010 at 9:30 AM  

It's so nice to hear a male voice on the topic. I wish you both all the very best and will be a regular visitor...

Willow January 27, 2010 at 10:45 PM  

I think it's awesome that you're sharing the male perspective on all this infertility craziness!

allcriedout2 February 1, 2010 at 8:35 PM  

I think it's awesome that you have started a blog about male infertility. Me and my husband were just talking about how it's such a hush hush thing. Not alot of men discuss this and I can understand why. So, thank you for opening up this blog.

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