What Do You Mean, "No Sex?!"

Thursday, October 22, 2009

I know that I probably won't get much support from the ladies out there when I moan and groan about my upcoming semen analysis (SA) on Monday.

Yes, I know your tests are much worse. Yes, I know that your tests are much more invasive. More painful. More awkward.

I will give you all that. And then some. No arguments.

But the SA is no walk in the park either! Even tossing aside the embarrassment of walking into the lab and trying to work up the courage to do the deed with Mr. Righty or Mr. Lefty, the SA is absolutely, positively no fun.

Why? Two words. No sex. The two scariest word to ever be uttered to a man. What do you mean, no sex? You mean for a few hours? Minutes?

Wait. You mean days? As in plural? As in a possible multitude of days?

Yes, I have been banished to the land of no sex until my SA on Monday. This is brutal. I'm a guy. I have needs.

My wife rolled her eyes and laughed when I lamented this news.

But surely someone out there feels a tiny bit sorry for me?

Someone? Anyone?


finding_ac October 22, 2009 at 9:05 PM  

you must be still in "newlywed mode" lol, most men are used to the "i dont get sex more than MAYBE once or twice a week thing. you make me laugh...hubbs and i realized the other day that we had went 10 days without doing the doo...can you imagine a stretch like that in your life if you are sad about a two day wait? lol

good luck...guess you can just build up all your lust for your wife and really wow her when you actually get to do the doo again!

♥ ac

btw- did you talk to your doctor about the possibility of you going on clomid? my hubbs got his most recent SA and he had 169 million per cc with 3.8 ml of fluid...we are living proof clomid for men works and i would hate for you to miss out on this valuable tool for upping the spermie count!

Anonymous,  October 23, 2009 at 6:33 AM  

Poor man! My hubby hates the ban before SA too, but after 11 years of marriage it's more about the fact that it's official he can't get any than that he's any more deprived than normal. Just think how great it will be on Monday - no not at the FS, but when you get home!

Good Eggies October 23, 2009 at 10:36 AM  

Awwwww. No sex? What will happen to you? JK!

From what I've heard it is a little daunting for a lot of guys to march into that little room and do your thing in a cup.

It wasn't too bad for my husband who probably didn't even notice to the multitudes of women and a few men in the waiting room. Let's just say he has plenty of experience in this particular exercise and well, while it's not quit the same as having sex you still get that wonderful "release".

As mommyinwaiting said - just think of the things you can do when you get home and good luck with the swimmer status ;)

Anonymous,  October 23, 2009 at 10:43 AM  

i hear you. the worst was the night before our last iui attempt. she really wanted to do the deed, ouch. that made it soo much harder (no pun intended).

Fran October 23, 2009 at 2:22 PM  

Oh you poor boy! And at the weekend !! :O))))
Let's just say that I really hope this forced abstinence will be worth it on monday. Much love, Fran

ps:thank you for the kind words on the award, I showed them to Mike he really like them too!

AmandaMqn October 23, 2009 at 3:15 PM  

The no sex is fine for the first two days but on day three, my husband and I both are usually pretty irritated!

Hope you manage to survive! :-P

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